27 May Resume Gaffes

You may have seen various resume or cover letter bloopers posted online.  At Integrated Staffing, we have seen several as well.  The following were received in just a two week period:

• Skills:  Pulled orders in an accurate and time consuming manner.
• Experience:  Not willing to relocate anywhere.  Candidate did not list any experience.
• Objective:  To obtain a position at a [sic] Hotel.  Candidate was applying for a warehouse production/assembly position.
• Objective:  Any job will do
• Skills: Strong atention to detail and acuracy.
• Introduction: Im applying 4 whse job w/u.
• I am also looking for something else, as I do not trust this job will last.  I have loyalty only to myself now.
• For contact information, candidate provided an email address that was a swear word.

To give you a few more ideas of what to avoid doing on your resume or cover letter, the following were taken from a list printed in Fortune Magazine:

• I demand a salary commiserate with my extensive experience.
• Reason for leaving last job: maturity leave.
• Its best for employers that I not work with people.
• You will want me to be Head Honcho in no time.
• I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.
• I am loyal to my employer at all costs…Please feel free to respond to my resume on my office voice mail.
• I have become completely paranoid, trusting completely no one and absolutely nothing.
• I procrastinate, especially when the task is unpleasant.
• Note: Please don’t miscontrue my 14 jobs as job-hopping.  I have never quit a job.
• Reason for leaving last job:  They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 a.m. every morning.  Could not work under those conditions.
• The company made me a scapegoat, just like my three previous employers.
• References:  None.  I’ve left a path of destruction behind me.

Be sure to take that second, or even third look at your resume and cover letter!